Big tears rolled down his little boy cheeks as he wept into his pillow. His voice was muffled as he said, “I want my music box. I want my fan.”
Tears filled my eyes as I rubbed his shaking back and answered him, “Sorry buddy, those stay in the big boy room now. If you want to sleep in the little boy room, you can’t have them.”
We had been making the transition slowly from the little boy room to the big boy room for weeks, but now it was time to rip off the Band-aid and just do it. Though I knew he’d better off in the long run and this was what was best for him, it still broke my heart to see my little boy so upset.
As I walked back to my room a short time later with a heavy heart, I was reminded that God feels the same way. There are many times throughout my life when I’ve been forced into to painful circumstances by a loving God. Circumstances that made me weep, throw a fit, and question, “Why?!” God being my loving parent knew those times were necessary, and I could feel his arms around me holding me and comforting me as I dealt with the pain. He never left. I believe he sat there and wept with me, just like he has always shared in his children’s suffering.
Remember Lazarus? When he died, Jesus even says it was good for him not to be there, so that the disciples could see and believe (John 11:14-15). And yet, when Mary and Martha came running to him, Jesus was overcome to see his friends grief and wept with them. He knew the final outcome was for their good, yet he still shared in their pain and didn’t leave them alone (John 11).
If you are feeling alone right now in circumstances beyond your control, know that you’re not alone. Jesus is still there by your side. His heart is breaking right along with yours. His tears are mingling with your own. I pray that you’ll feel his presence surrounding you right now. Through his word, through his people, but most of all through his almost tangible presence and peace that you can feel when you throw your self in his arms and weep.