It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife. ~Prov. 21:9
Just like stone can be worn away over time by a constant drip, so can the strongest relationship be worn away over time by constant complaining.
One the the most valuable things I have learned from Jeremy’s constant travel and crazy work schedule over the last 10 1/2 years is to ignore the small stuff. Much of the small stuff that drives many a wife bonkers (clothes on the floor, pocket stuff on the counter, etc…) I have simply learned to overlook.
This has nothing to do with me being such a good wife or these things not driving me equally crazy at times. Instead it has everything to do with those things not being worth my time to talk about in the small amount of time I get to see him.
Early on in our marriage, I quickly learned that nagging and complaining about the small stuff was a sure fire way to start an argument of some sort, so that we ended up spending our brief moments together arguing and not connecting. I quickly found out it just wasn’t worth it. If I was going to see Jeremy for only a day or so a week, I didn’t want to spend it arguing about something small.
That isn’t to say we never talk about these things. I’ll mention them every now and then, but I do try very hard to pay attention to my timing and to not keep on about them.
Instead, I try to spend the time I do have with him doing the things we enjoy together, asking him about his day, and telling him about what the boys did that day. We both try to be present. Because when your time together is limited every moment becomes a gift.
These small purposeful moments add up. Until what once was becoming a canyon, instead begins to grow into a mountain.