I’m getting to the point with two children that I am once again feeling in over my head on a daily basis. What in the world did I do with Ethan at 4 months? How did I handle the nap time change? Why is Liam so fussy lately? How do I teach a 2 year old not to whine? How do I handle it when Ethan tries to discover the boundaries?
Having Liam actually helps me as I struggle through some of Ethan’s issues. Liam’s crying and ways of expressing his needs, remind me that Ethan is not intentionally disobeying (most of the time) or trying to drive me crazy. He’s having a hard time, too, with this change of learning to communicate in a new way since the old way is no longer appropriate for him.
With Liam’s issues, I’m once again reminded that in parenting change is the constant, and constant revision of methods and seeing what works is okay. I don’t have to figure it out or get it right the first time. Thank goodness!
I’m also floored daily by the differences between these two boys (parents of more than one-I know your just smiling and nodding). Ethan went by the book. If letting him crying it out for 3 nights was supposed to work, then it did. Liam is still holding out, though making progress, 14 nights later! Now I’m beginning to think, “No wonder I told my Mom she wasn’t fair! How can you possibly keep it appearing “fair” when they are as different as night and day?”
Thankfully, before I went perfectly crazy, my “Parenting by Design” devo reminded me that as Christians we have the Holy Spirit here to guide us:
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another counselor to help you and be with you forever…But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all thing as will remind you of everything I have said to you. (John 14:16, 26)
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. (James 1:5)
Until my devo pointed it out, I had failed to consider that these verses could also refer to parenting. That the same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead is here with me even I feel overwhelmed as a parent. What a relief!
Amen! I had to laugh, and then almost cry at your post, and I’m only 5 weeks into this parenting of two so far! Mine couldn’t be more different either and I feel most days that I can’t remember the magic plans I had that made parenting Emery so easy. Alas… it’s normal. Thanks for the reminder!
Mallory